Do you have a question you've always wanted answered? Do you have a helpful idea, a solution, or an answer to a problem you've handled successfully that you'd like to share to help your peers? The Questions and Answers section of Teen Time is specifically for you to ask questions about issues in your life and provide inspiration for others.

Note: Make sure you check out previous questions. You may be able to read or give new and helpful answers.

 
     
  Question 62  
 
Q62  

Why does everyone gossip, and how can we deal with it?

 
 
     
  Visitor Answer 62  
 
A62  

Gossip can show up in the littlest ways. It can be shown through hurtful comments; it can be started by jealousy; or it can come from simple discussion. But whatever way it appears, it hurts.

It seems that people gossip because they’re insecure or selfish. Many people feel that they don’t have what it takes to be the best, so they put down others so they can look better. They are not confident enough with themselves, so they think they can use things against others to try to gain more confidence within themselves. Other times, people are jealous of others so they use words to put them down and try to overpower them. They even try to get their friends to side with them. People who gossip only look at the outward appearance instead of looking beyond the surface to see what the person they’re talking about is really like underneath. It is sad to think that gossip can make the victim lose relationships and confidence.

Gossip never stops until someone stands up and doesn’t let it affect him or her. Letting yourself get hurt by gossip is one of the worst things you can do. But it’s hard not to feel hurt. One of the ways to fight gossip is to forgive the person who is gossiping about you. Forgiving someone can be the hardest, but the best, thing to do.

Jesus demonstrated forgiveness. He loved unconditionally, even when he was at the point of dying. When he was on the cross, Jesus said, “Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do” (Luke 23:34). This clearly shows that all it takes to overcome the lies and labels people place on you is to love first and then forgive.

When you love and forgive, all the jealousy, hate, and selfishness will not affect you. It may even fall away. Even though it seems crazy sometimes to love or to forgive someone, loving and forgiving will give you much more confidence in yourself and who you want to become.

 
    -- Devon Harrison, teenager  
    To find out how one person stopped gossip among her peers, read Making a Difference.  
       
 
     
 

Email us your questions, answers, and inspirational comments.

We will answer and post as many Q&As as possible each month. It's always great to include Bible passages that have helped you.

 
 
 

Previous
Questions and Answers

 
  How do you deal with stressful situations?  
  What can I do if I don’t feel I measure up to my parents’ expectations?  
  Why is it so important to lead an unselfish life?  
  I’m the one that always does the work, while my younger sibling goofs off. I feel jealous of my brother. What can I do?  
  How do you forgive someone who doesn’t seem to deserve forgiveness?  
  How do you have a good self-image?  
  How do you find the right amount of self-confidence?  
  How or why should you be kind to someone you really don’t like?  
  How can you keep your individuality, fit in, and have friends when people judge you on appearances?  
  I don’t like it when people pick on others. Can one person really make a difference?  
  How do you deal with anger?  
  What’s so wrong with using steroids to build up your strength?  
  Are there any Bible passages that can help me pray about poverty?  
  What do you do when your siblings are not as into God as you are?  
  How do you balance sports and academics?  
 

How can I keep from reacting when people are judging me?

 
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  Is there a right way to think about food so that it doesn’t control us?  
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  How do I deal with not wanting to move to a new place and go to a new school?  
  When suggestions or thoughts come to you to take your life, what can you do?  
  How do you handle the temptations to have sex, drink, steal, etc?  
  Why is it so important to be yourself?  
  How can I make every week not seem so long and pointless?  
  How do you deal with criticism?  
  What do you do when you feel that your parents don’t know what’s best for you in the long run?  
  How can I find ideas when I have no inspiration to write a paper?  
  When a friend comes to you with a problem, how can you help him or her when you aren’t sure what to say?  
  If you bully others, why should you stop? And if you’re being bullied, how do you deal with it?  
  Why do people say that confidence is so important for teenagers?  
  How do you make the right decisions?  
  Peer pressure comes up in most of our lives, so how do you say, “No”?  
  How can we be happy when there are so many problems in high school?  
  Is it important to forgive?  
  The Bible says that God created mankind to “have dominion . . . over every living thing.” What exactly does that mean in relation to how we treat our earth?  
  How do you break stereotypes and make new friends when others make fun of you for reaching beyond the “accepted” circle?  
  How do we know if what we want is really what we need?  
  What do you do and how do you work when a teacher doesn't like you?  
  Moses stood on "holy ground." Did that mean he didn't need to go into the Promised Land?  
  How do I handle an abusive relationship?  
  Am I ever going to feel happy again?  
  What exactly is "Moses' sin"?  
  Is there anything in the Bible about interracial relations?  
  How do I deal with rejection?  
  How can you become a better student?  
  Why is the Bible so graphic at times?  
  Are there any Bible stories about relieving stress?  
  Why are the Midianites enslaving the children of Israel around Gideon's time?  
  What if Jesus never lived?  
  Does God really care about us?  
  How do you make good friends?  
  How do you motivate yourself to do things you don't really want to do but you should do?  
  How did the Children of Israel find water in a desert?  
  How do you know what's right to do in different situations?  
  In reference to the question, "Does God exist?" I'd like to learn more about the nature or concept of God.  
  Why did life spans of people go down when the flood happened?  
  How do we know God exists?
 
  I was wondering how to deal with people who speak in a harsh or unkind way unjustly, especially in the work field.
 
  How do you not get caught up in appearances and expectations and still not seem out-of-date, behind the times, or out-of-place?
 
  How can I feel good about myself when I don't like the way I look?  
 
 
     
   
     
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