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Many of us struggle with this. After
coming home from a tough day at school
or work, sometimes all we want to do is
relax, hang out with our friends, surf
the web, read, watch TV, or do nothing.
And usually the last things we want to
do are our chores or homework or walking
the dog or whatever else might fall under
the "should" category. Even
Paul says, "For the good that I would
I do not" (Romans 7:19). And yet,
these "shoulds" are really important.
And there are some other important "shoulds,"
like being kind to others even when they
aren't kind to us and talking with respect
to everyone, even to those who treat us
disrespectfully.
There are mental, spiritual, and practical
ways we can motivate ourselves.
The most significant way we can motivate
ourselves is to change our attitude towards
the "shoulds" in life. This
change can be as easy or as difficult
as we want to make it. But to be effective,
the change must be based on our understanding
of God.
- When I was young, my mom always told
my brother and me, "If you can't
do something with joy, don't do it at
all." And then we would come back
with, "Well then, I guess I won't
do it." Of course, as we stood
over the dishwasher after dinner, she
would say, "But you have to do
it, so you might as well do it with
joy." We didn't have a choice regarding
whether or not we did the dishes. It
was part of our way to contribute to
our family. The real lesson was not
to ignore chores, but to do them willingly
and happily. So, we would sing or tell
stories or talk about our days as we
did the dishes. We understood that we
were giving to our family. And giving
is fun to do. Giving is not a burden.
Giving makes everyone involved happy.
- Another way to change our attitude
is to make the shift from "I have
to do something" to "I
get to do something." It
seems simple and maybe a little fake,
but it really works if you sincerely
mean it. Instead of I have to do my
math homework, try saying, "I get
to do my math homework and learn about
principles that actually do apply to
my life, even though I may not understand
how yet. I get to mow the lawn and smell
nicely cut grass while making our home
beautiful. I get to write my English
paper and discover original ideas. I
get to take care of my little brother
or sister and allow my parents some
free time."
- If you really try to see the purpose
behind the "have to's" of
life, it's easier to understand why
they are important. And there will still
be times when we don't understand why
we have to do something. But trusting
that God knows what's best for us sure
makes life easier. The less we fight
against the "shoulds," the
faster we get them done and the more
harmonious our lives feel.
- See and trust the promise in this
passage from the Bible:
Finally, brethren, whatsoever things
are true, whatsoever things are
honest, whatsoever things are just,
whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever
things are lovely, whatsoever things
are of good report; if there be
any virtue, and if there be any
praise, think on these things. Those
things, which ye have both learned,
and received, and heard, and seen
in me, do: and the God of peace
shall be with you. Phil. 4:8,9
What we need to do generally fits
into one of these categories. The
point is not just "to think"
about these things, but to bring these
good things into our experience. And
if we do, the promise is that God
will provide us with peace and will
be with us always. What an incredible
promise!
Then there are some practical ways
to motivate ourselves.
- First of all, figure out what really
motivates you. What do you like doing?
- We can make a pact with ourselves
that we will reward ourselves with something
we like after we have finished those
things we need to do. It could mean
taking time off to relax or go to a
movie, etc. But we have to promise ourselves
that we can't have our reward until
our work is done and done well.
- It's also helpful to set a schedule
that allows for breaks. For instance,
do homework for 30 min., listen to music
for 10; do chores for 30 min., ride
your skateboard for 20 min.; homework
for an hour, etc. Plan whatever works
for you. But during that "need
to do" time, you really can't day-dream.
You have to stay focused.
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